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straightpunk
Posts: 40
Joined: Mon Sep 15, 2014 6:09 am

Hi

Post by straightpunk »

First i would like to say that i a'm very very knew to this Buddhist thing and have joined up mainly just to ask some questions, and learn a bit more.

I'm not the best with words or explaining myself but i'll do my best
Just to tell a bit of my history...I am 31, i have had a bit of a crap childhood, have suffered anxiety and depression problems all through life, i have been an alcoholic but have quit now for 3 years, i have been to lots of counseling/psychologists for these problems.
A few years ago i picked up a John Kabat Zinn book "the mindful way through depression", i done the 8 week meditation course and it really helped me out, more so probably than some of the techniques like Cognitive behavioral therapy. It was good knowing the scientific side of things and having everything very guided in a nice easy to understand "westernized" way. It was great training my mind just to be still and not get carried away in thoughts, which was great as my thoughts are very negative and i have a problem with being assertive, so people tend to walk all over me which sets off the "getting carried away in my thoughts" again.

....annyway, though training my brain to stop thinking so much was great i felt like i needed something with more meaning, like i needed some kind of general outlook to have on life to stop myself being so angry all the time. So then being into punk music i came across Brad Warners "hardcore zen" and "sit down and shut up". I knew John Kabat Zinns stuff came from Buddhism so i thought this could be interesting. I really enjoyed the books, i really liked how straight up it was, no after life (before lives), enlightenment is meditating not some massive high you get, and so on. But i got a bit lost in some bit's though when he was explaining some of the things dogen (the guys book he was kind of translating) said. Also he lost me when he said the zen way was the only way to meditate when the Jon Kabat Zinn techniques like the body scan and so forth worked for me....or did they? maybe i would have been better off doing zen meditation? also some of his life examples relating to Buddhism didn't really make any huge impression on me. I'm not really even sure what exact type of Buddhism he was talking about, but it was one that sounded good to me for the most part, but then i don't really know of any others apart from the spiritual ones with after lives and stuff that i don't really dig.

So i don't have any Buddha teachers for at least 5 hours drive and don't know anybody who is into it, and i guess i just feel a little up in the air as what to be concentrating on. Yeah i know i should just be meditating and i am everyday, i guess i just need some concrete ground/ morals or something i can remind myself to think when my anger hate and stupid excuses come in to my head saying why other people should see the same way as i do or feel the pain they have inflicted on me.

Anyway sorry if that all sounds confusing, but i would much appreciate any feedback, thanks
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Ayu
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Re: Hi

Post by Ayu »

Welcome, straightpunk.
I think, to have some inspirations from this board would be very good for you in the begining. Just pick and choose the helpful things.
Maybe later one day it will be even better to drive 5 hours to meet a real good teacher. :meditate: :smile: For everything there is a season.

:namaste: Ayu
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DNS
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Re: Hi

Post by DNS »

Welcome to Dharma Wheel!

:buddha1:
straightpunk
Posts: 40
Joined: Mon Sep 15, 2014 6:09 am

Re: Hi

Post by straightpunk »

Thanks for the welcomes, i guess i was kind of hoping for some tips on what kind of Buddhism to follow or some other books to read or something, looking at the forums now though i guess i should have just made up a topic in the exploring Buddhism thread....I'm also getting that it was "zen" Buddhism that i liked obviously, for some reason i just guessed there were other ones that branched off that or something.....i will learn as i read the forum
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dharmagoat
Posts: 2159
Joined: Mon Oct 19, 2009 8:39 pm

Re: Hi

Post by dharmagoat »

Hello straightpunk, welcome to Dharma Wheel. :smile:

No-one can choose for you what style of Buddhism to follow any more than they can choose what clothes you wear or what music you listen to. I would recommend that you participate in whatever discussions on this forum interest you and to simply follow that interest. No form of Buddhism can be considered superior to any other, yet each of us will find for ourselves the Buddhism that suits us best. We choose that path with our entire being, not just with those qualities within ourselves that we consider holy.

I wish you all the best.
shaunc
Posts: 883
Joined: Fri Jan 11, 2013 8:10 am

Re: Hi

Post by shaunc »

There's supposedly 84,000 different types/techniques of Buddhism. If you feel that one particular type of meditation helps you more than another type go with it. No one else can walk your path for you, so pick which ever is better suited to you.
DGA
Former staff member
Posts: 9466
Joined: Tue Jul 13, 2010 5:04 pm

Re: Hi

Post by DGA »

Hi straightpunk,

Welcome to DharmaWheel. I saw your post on looking for helpful books as well as your intro, so I'm responding to both of them here.

You're new. It's confusing. You're probably struggling but you definitely want to do the right thing, go the right way, and keep on the track. Am I close?

If so, then now isn't the time to worry about which tradition to pick, or which book to read. Now's the time to find a teacher who can guide you, a temple or practice group that can support you and help you find a routine of practice that works for you. This isn't something you can do alone.

I know you mentioned that there are no teachers within five hours' drive of you. You might be surprised, because there are many that are not listed on the internet or have unusual names that are hard to find. If you tell us roughly where you live, just generally, someone on the board who knows the score may be able to help you find something or someone.

You may also need to pack your stuff and move to a place with a good Dharma community, if that's possible for you. That's a better alternative that struggling where there are no options.

Also, if you are in recovery, it's essential that you stick with your program and get proper medical care when and as appropriate. Buddhism is wonderful but it's no substitute for professional medical care.

I wish you all the best in your practice.

Jikan
straightpunk
Posts: 40
Joined: Mon Sep 15, 2014 6:09 am

Re: Hi

Post by straightpunk »

Jikan wrote:Hi straightpunk,

Welcome to DharmaWheel. I saw your post on looking for helpful books as well as your intro, so I'm responding to both of them here.

You're new. It's confusing. You're probably struggling but you definitely want to do the right thing, go the right way, and keep on the track. Am I close?

yes
If so, then now isn't the time to worry about which tradition to pick, or which book to read. Now's the time to find a teacher who can guide you, a temple or practice group that can support you and help you find a routine of practice that works for you. This isn't something you can do alone.

I know you mentioned that there are no teachers within five hours' drive of you. You might be surprised, because there are many that are not listed on the internet or have unusual names that are hard to find. If you tell us roughly where you live, just generally, someone on the board who knows the score may be able to help you find something or someone.

You may also need to pack your stuff and move to a place with a good Dharma community, if that's possible for you. That's a better alternative that struggling where there are no options.

Also, if you are in recovery, it's essential that you stick with your program and get proper medical care when and as appropriate. Buddhism is wonderful but it's no substitute for professional medical care.

I wish you all the best in your practice.

Jikan
No i can't move away as i have a house a wife and jobs and things. I'm actually a bit nervous about the hole teacher thing as i'm very self conscious and skeptical and all that, all so i'm not sure which teacher would be teaching the right thing for me, though i know i have to look into it as it seems to be a must.

I a'm actually over the drink and am more in recovery from the drugs the medical system prescribed me, i'm still only half way through weening off them, it will be about another year before i am fully off these friggin pills. It's been harder to come off these pills than the drink or even cigarettes :x ......so yeah, i have kind of lost my faith in the medical system
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Karma Dorje
Posts: 1416
Joined: Thu Sep 01, 2011 10:35 pm

Re: Hi

Post by Karma Dorje »

Howdy straightpunk,

I was into the whole hardcore scene back in the late 70s and early 80s and there are a few other people here with similar backgrounds. I think the same kind of attitude that led me to question society, politics and musical expression also found an outlet in investigating religion and philosophy.

I agree with some of the other posters, just read everything you can get your hands on that interests you without worrying about what form of Buddhism it is. Some (or even a lot) of it you won't understand now and that's OK. It's the same for everyone. If you keep reading, you end up starting to digest more and more of it even if you don't find a teacher right away. Don't be discouraged, just take away from it what you can.

In terms of working with anger, I dealt with a lot of free-floating anger when I first started meditating seriously. I think that Thubten Chodron's book on anger has some excellent methods:

http://www.amazon.com/Working-With-Ange ... 1559391634" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

The biggest thing for success in a sitting practice is to do it regularly. It's better to sit every day for 10 minutes than to sit every week for an hour. Over time you will find you really look forward to these times you can just drop all the bullshit and be with yourself with no games, words, etc. Lots of people have found that keeping to this just naturally opened up opportunities to meet teachers.
"Although my view is higher than the sky, My respect for the cause and effect of actions is as fine as grains of flour."
-Padmasambhava
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Dan74
Former staff member
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Location: Switzerland

Re: Hi

Post by Dan74 »

Hi straightpunk :hi: and welcome to DW!

Regarding books, for a bit more of a feel of Zen practice, I'd recommend

(for Rinzai):

http://www.amazon.com/Novice-Master-Ong ... 0861713931

preview here: http://www.wisdompubs.org/sites/default ... view_0.pdf

http://www.amazon.com/Zen-Way-Myokyo-Ni/dp/0804830762

(for Soto):

http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/1172 ... -questions

and other stuff by Taigen Dan Leighton

There are also such classics as Zen Mind, Beginners Mind, Opening the hand of Thought (Soto), Gentling the Bull, In the hoofprints of the Ox (Rinzai).

These are all modern books and probably a little gentler than the classics to start with.

Best of luck!

_/|\_
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Karma Dorje
Posts: 1416
Joined: Thu Sep 01, 2011 10:35 pm

Re: Hi

Post by Karma Dorje »

Dan74 wrote: There are also such classics as Zen Mind, Beginners Mind, Opening the hand of Thought (Soto), Gentling the Bull, In the hoofprints of the Ox (Rinzai).

These are all modern books and probably a little gentler than the classics to start with.

Best of luck!

_/|\_
'Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind' is an awesome book. Well worth reading. I would add 'Zen Flesh, Zen Bones' as well.
"Although my view is higher than the sky, My respect for the cause and effect of actions is as fine as grains of flour."
-Padmasambhava
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dharmagoat
Posts: 2159
Joined: Mon Oct 19, 2009 8:39 pm

Re: Hi

Post by dharmagoat »

Karma Dorje wrote:'Zen Mind, Beginner's Mind' is an awesome book. Well worth reading.
I recommend it too.
straightpunk
Posts: 40
Joined: Mon Sep 15, 2014 6:09 am

Re: Hi

Post by straightpunk »

Wow! thanks for all the recommendations, i think that anger book maybe be a help also as that's something i really need a help with. I will be straight to the library assap, or buy some or whatever.
straightpunk
Posts: 40
Joined: Mon Sep 15, 2014 6:09 am

Re: Hi

Post by straightpunk »

Karma Dorje wrote:Howdy straightpunk,

I was into the whole hardcore scene back in the late 70s and early 80s and there are a few other people here with similar backgrounds. I think the same kind of attitude that led me to question society, politics and musical expression also found an outlet in investigating religion and philosophy.

I agree with some of the other posters, just read everything you can get your hands on that interests you without worrying about what form of Buddhism it is. Some (or even a lot) of it you won't understand now and that's OK. It's the same for everyone. If you keep reading, you end up starting to digest more and more of it even if you don't find a teacher right away. Don't be discouraged, just take away from it what you can.

In terms of working with anger, I dealt with a lot of free-floating anger when I first started meditating seriously. I think that Thubten Chodron's book on anger has some excellent methods:

http://www.amazon.com/Working-With-Ange ... 1559391634" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

The biggest thing for success in a sitting practice is to do it regularly. It's better to sit every day for 10 minutes than to sit every week for an hour. Over time you will find you really look forward to these times you can just drop all the bullshit and be with yourself with no games, words, etc. Lots of people have found that keeping to this just naturally opened up opportunities to meet teachers.
Cool to hear there are people with similar backgrounds, i'm not old enough to have been in the hardcore scene of the 70s and 80s but i do have a passion for that type of music....not that i play or anything, just a fan.
At the moment i do a sitting meditation for at least ten minute twice everyday, i have been doing that for about a year now, though earlier i was doing body scans and probably doing sitting meditations for longer. And yeah i guess i feel that i a'm at that point now where i want to further my interests and ask some more questions.
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