Gwenn Dana wrote:
Challenge23 wrote:Clear, logical, consistent answers to questions that sound pedantic and foolish in my head that just will not go away.
What would the answer have to be so the question goes away?
First, I apologize for going dark for so long. Everything is pretty much ok at the moment. Still practicing, still working at it.
The best way to answer your question, I think, is something that I actually thought for awhile(but currently believe doesn't quite match up to the data that I have).
"Nirvana is a state in which the brain/mindstream connection is severed and the mindstream doesn't rejoin into a new body(another way to think of it would be a morphogenic field a-la Sheldrake but unconnected to anything physical). The experiences of an independant mindstream are beyond conception because we experience everything through a body and therefore can't concieve of a mindstream untethered to a body. However, it is weakly categorized as 'good' and 'positive' but really it can't be said to be 'good' or 'bad'. The only thing that can be said about it is that because it is not linked to a body the problems that bodies tend run into don't apply."
Like that. Precise, clear, and something that doesn't make it feel like a very, very drawn out form of suicide.
The current answer I am working with is that I was doing something not quite right during my recitations. Basically because I was using single Vajrasattva I was seeing just Nirvana which, according to the teacher I was speaking to on the matter, is pretty much exactly as I percieved it("Nirvana is death, crawl up your own ass and die", as she put it). A sort of haunting nothing that very strongly resembles what scientific materialists think happens to everyone when they die. The problem is that the technique I was using requires a unity of Nirvana AND Samsara. So I've been using Vajrasattva in yab-yum and have gone back to "nothing really happening". I consider this a good sign as "nothing really happening" is one step over from "haunting nothing" and hopefully in time it will produce at least a glimpse of what everyone else seems to have such faith in.
So, for future readers. Learn from my mistake. If when you are practicing you get a sort of super scary nothing and you are using single Vajrasattva, consider talking to your teacher about switching to Vajrasattva in yab-yum as a reminder to think of attainment as the unity of Nirvana and Samsara.
IN THIS BOOK IT IS SPOKEN OF THE SEPHIROTH & THE PATHS, OF SPIRITS & CONJURATIONS, OF GODS, SPHERES, PLANES & MANY OTHER THINGS WHICH MAY OR MAY NOT EXIST. IT IS IMMATERIAL WHETHER THEY EXIST OR NOT. BY DOING CERTAIN THINGS CERTAIN RESULTS FOLLOW; STUDENTS ARE MOST EARNESTLY WARNED AGAINST ATTRIBUTING OBJECTIVE REALITY OR PHILOSOPHICAL VALIDITY TO ANY OF THEM.
Wagner, Eric; Wilson, Robert Anton (2004-12-01). An Insider's Guide to Robert Anton Wilson (Kindle Locations 1626-1629). New Falcon Publications. Kindle Edition., quoting from Alister Crowley