Spira describes this in an interesting way, as always it seems so obvious that you wonder why we never see it like this.
He says how all of life is a natural process of moving from a primordial oneness at birth through a natural evolution of developing the sense of separation, neti-neti, or the ego, to a 'post' egoic realization that we are not that too, and in so seeing, gradually re-integrate that awareness with the understanding that it is both/and, Brahman and Atman, not one or the other. The belief in a separate self is not wrong, it's just incomplete.
Up to this point, we have believed that our consciousness is 'in' the world, but realization consists of seeing that it is the world that is merged in awareness. He says, "that is usually where people get stuck, and spend the rest of their lives."
He ends by saying that in raising children, they must be allowed to discover this for themselves, in an environment of love and freedom. And of course with parents who have been through this process. Simple?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tCJpI1bN4Pg
I think I grew up with the love and freedom to do pretty much what I wanted, but unfortunately both my parents were unconscious of who we really are; my mother is 77 now, and still doesn't see it. That would seem to explain where many if not all of my problems came from as a teenager: wanting to know what this is, who am I really, and having a mother who couldn't answer.
To this day its a never ending source of grief. I mean having to be around her, getting sucked back into her depressing unhappy life, and a brother and sister who are very similar. It creates a bad vibe, a frequency which is uncompatable with my own. There is their story, their version of it, and that's it. It's like they have sealed themselves off from discovering true happiness and understanding.
I love them, and feel having some kind of relationship enriches our lives, but its hard when they are so unconscious.
Family would seem to be the place where our first sense of community is born, and I can see how detrimental that was to my natural development. I would have done better with the right support, and environment of openness, but alas it wasn't that, it's this, right here, right now.