This is going to be a mixed bag post I suppose so here goes. I've talked about Ratnasambhava before, this blessed Buddha is somehow firmly fixed in my daily life. There really isn't a day where I don't think about Lord Ratnasambhava, his merits and virtues, his southern realm and his consorts. So much so that I have incorporated him into my daily practice.
But I find I think and reflect on Ratnasambhava more so than Amitabha, to the point of feeling guilty and that my practice to Amitabha isn't as sincere as it should be. In The Pratyutpanna Samadhi Sutra, the buddha describes how to attain rebirth in Amitabha's pureland, but goes on to explain that one should not attach oneself to this land or another, that like the sunlight reflecting on the ocean we shall be everywhere at once. He explains that if someone focuses on a Buddha of a particular direction he shall see him either in the day time or in a dream. I have much to learn of this particular sutra, but my point being that there must be some reason Ratnasambhava is so prominent in my life. I welcome his presence, however I'm not quite sure what I should be doing.
I welcome your constructive views, take care
OK, just a reality check - guilty about doing dharma practice? You know that recollecting the Buddha (Buddhanusmrti/nembutsu) is considered good, right?
But I can relate, I get totally irrational guilt too, worrying about not doing dharma practice right. I just have to remind myself that the guilt itself is my own defilement. And then just acknowledge the good that I'm doing for even trying.
But anyway, if you feel drawn to Ratnasambhava, practice with him. If tomorrow you want time with Medicine Buddha, call him. If your devotion to Ratnasambhava is sincere, then your devotion to Amitabha is also sincere. If there is a voice in your head telling you otherwise, that is not real, that is mara. Think, "oh mara, how wonderful that you have joined me when I am practicing Buddhanusmrti! You must have an auspicious karmic connection to both Ratnasambhava and Amitabha!" and invite mara to practice with you. And be patient with yourself, realize it is your own inner afflictions coming up to be purified. Let it inspire compassion, cause the fight that you are having with yourself is the same fight going on in every dualistic mind, in one way or another.
Keep up the good work!!!