An Old Lie

A forum for discussion of Buddhist ethics.
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Taraplecas
Posts: 1
Joined: Mon Dec 24, 2018 5:51 pm

An Old Lie

Post by Taraplecas »

Hello,

I have recently starting my new journey with Buddhism. It truly speaks to me with such beauty. I had many hard struggles when I was a teenager. I have forgiven myself and believe that my mistakes helped me learn and become a better person. The problem is that I lied to my sister about something that still really haunts me. I don’t know if I should be letting go or if I should tell her. It will hurt her really bad to hear the truth but I feel I need too, to move on. But this is also selfish of me because it was well over 10 years ago. It was also my mother that lied and I made the personal choice to follow in it. My sister will also be very hurt at my mom. I have mediated on this but I still feel lost and could use some insight.

Thank you
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Sherab
Posts: 1375
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2010 6:28 am

Re: An Old Lie

Post by Sherab »

In Mahayana, you place the benefit to others above benefit to yourself. So the question you have to answer very carefully is whether the disclosure of the truth is of such great benefit to her that the hurt would pale in comparison. I said very carefully because (1) the deluded mind is very good at deluding itself, i.e., you may convince yourself that it is of great benefit to her because you unconsciously or subconsciously wanted to think that way. and (2) if you are wrong, you will regret it and it cannot be undone.

If you know of an enlightened master whom you can consult with regarding your problem, you should go to him/her.
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