Minobu wrote: ↑
Thu Jan 18, 2018 6:17 pm
Well maybe stuff changed since i was in.
i could give you examples of mother being a chapter chief helping keep a district chief and wife together.
she would show up at me mum's battered from another drunken nightmare. couple of times with strangle marks...me mom was praised for keeping them together in order for them to put on the weekend meeting...more than once..
i'm not talking murder here...but a lot of real vile behaviour was forgiven. and if you posted my whole post you would see my take on it...for this was discussed.
there were a lot of stuff that people did and were not shunned...the only shunning was when i joined Nichiren shoshu...then out right lies about my person were spread....years later i never got an apology when i met a high up leader in the street...brought the subject up and he just explained stuff like ..."that all that has changed now...it was a complicated time....lot of anger ..."
I'm just saying "don't know if i got this but it was sort of like that in the gakki....as long as you did their thing anything was forgiven/brushed under the rug..."
anything is a little over the top..or is it?
I don't know the details of what you are talking about, but I can relate to an extent.
In the context of SGI, a lot of real life stuff happens and comes up. If you're happy and content with a house and picket fence, 2.5 kids and happy marriage, you're probably not looking for anything - maybe some lifestyle enhancers like yoga and lattes. If you are willing to take up a radically different approach to life, its probably because stuff has hit the fan, or you have a deep seated dissatisfaction with the way things are for you. I saw marriage counseling, I saw relationship counseling... it usually boiled down to advice to trust the wisdom that emerges through your practice and then having the strength to follow through with that wisdom.
DV is a complicated thing. I have no idea what this woman was going through, what her experience was, and what your mother counseled to her. I also don't know if the way you're casting your mother's involvement is an accurate assessment of what happened. Did your mother really counsel this woman to take a beating so that a meeting could take place? Or was that the tone deaf response of others to the course of events?
These days it seems everything has a happy gloss - people's facebook feeds show happy lives and all that. We don't see the real stuff that goes on that is not happy, except when it erupts into tragedy and makes the news. But in a close religious community, you become the extended family and you see a lot of raw stuff go down.
That said, I'm not saying that kind of misanthropic crap doesn't happen. I think you will see that kind of stuff in all human communities. Does not make it right or OK.
That said, there is one sin that is unacceptable - and that's joining "the temple". I'm not surprised you got attacked for that. I've seen similar. That schism was nasty and brought out a lot of the worst. I imagine it has to have mellowed by now.
“Once you have given up the ghost, everything follows with dead certainty, even in the midst of chaos.”
"Language is the liquid that we're all dissolved in.
Great for solving problems, after it creates the problems."
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