How to help people the quickest?

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prsvrnc
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How to help people the quickest?

Post by prsvrnc » Sat May 30, 2015 6:31 am

Hello, this could sound like proselytizing but in all earnestness I mean this very seriously: how does someone impart genuine Buddhist teachings to a person who is for all intents and purposes dharmiclly destined but has not yet met any official doctrine/teaching (aside from his/her connection to you)? That could sound weird and if so, then just treat it as a hypothetical.

My friend became really interested in samsara and asked question after question. It was really inspiring. I want to share more, but unsure how to do so without it seeming like I want to convert her. If [you] believe the teachings can put an end to suffering and see that they could work out that way for her, what does someone with great enthusiasm in this way do to help her most (her and others) the most quickly????? It takes time... time for oneself and time also to help others. Time is so limited!! I guess my only thought is, to, well, work to achieve enlightenment myself (practice, of course) and then just take those rare gems of an opportunity to talk to her when they arise (when she asks). And also, of course, to show compassion day to day, in every action, for her, indicating care for her genuine well-being (which makes it so that she will also trust me when I tell her dharma).

Maybe I have answered my own question... Maybe if I turn inwards at this second (practice) the path will be made clear. I suppose it is also a question of... what really DOES help people, either in this life (worldly) or else in future lives??? What is it that propels them onwards or forwards in their spiritual journey? My journey was definitely not linear... and took a very long time to generate any faith in teachings, despite a sense of faith somewhere abstract.... She is like me in that respect.... great faith but it isn't pegged anywhere. (To me that is not a contradiction but perhaps it will read that way.)

I guess that was more like a ramble. Any thoughts are welcome. *prayers* *inspiration* loveee :anjali: :anjali: :consoling: :buddha2: :buddha1: :buddha1:

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Ayu
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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by Ayu » Sat May 30, 2015 11:39 am

I know such concerns about my family, who are atheists/materialists all together.
Proselytizing by talking and not accepting them would cause harm to the dharma and the persons. They are all intelligent enough to realize it themselves one day and I cannot form them according to my believes.

I found out the best and only ways are to perform prayers and meditations for them and to work hard to be a good example of the benefits of buddhism. To practice genuine compassion and equanimity and to be their friend is the best. It helps them a lot. And since they never complain about me being a buddhist but telling with a kind of pride: "My wife/mother is buddhist!", I think the track is going in the right direction. :smile:
I have decided to stick with love.
Hate is too great a burden to bear.
- Martin Luther King, Jr. -

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Ayu
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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by Ayu » Sat May 30, 2015 11:44 am

Regarding the keyword "quickest":
There is a zen saying: "You cannot pull to make the gras grow." People need their time and their own experiences according to their karma.
I have decided to stick with love.
Hate is too great a burden to bear.
- Martin Luther King, Jr. -

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Vasana
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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by Vasana » Sat May 30, 2015 11:59 am

How to help people the quickest?

Become realized :meditate:

"If you really wish to benefit others, the first step is to attain realization yourself. You must first mature your own mind, otherwise you will be incapable of helping others. Giving other people water is impossible unless you have a jug with water in it. If it is empty, you might make the gesture of pouring , but no water will come out." ~ Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche -


Just be a good example of how the teachings can transform the mind and be very honest when you think you might not be explaining an aspect of the Dharma as well as it is presented in the teachings. Following the teachings is one thing, but actually being able to communicate them effectively *and at the right time * is another thing all together.

Rather than try to explain everything to them every time , sometimes point them towards resources that might suit their capacities and perceptive angle.
"The changing cycle of joy and sorrow, like the changing seasons –
As a time of suffering will surely come around to me,
May I truly practice the sublime teachings."
- Dudjom Rinpoche

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Karma Dondrup Tashi
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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by Karma Dondrup Tashi » Sat May 30, 2015 2:16 pm

Vasana wrote:How to help people the quickest?

Become realized :meditate:

"If you really wish to benefit others, the first step is to attain realization yourself. You must first mature your own mind, otherwise you will be incapable of helping others. Giving other people water is impossible unless you have a jug with water in it. If it is empty, you might make the gesture of pouring , but no water will come out." ~ Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche -


Just be a good example of how the teachings can transform the mind and be very honest when you think you might not be explaining an aspect of the Dharma as well as it is presented in the teachings. Following the teachings is one thing, but actually being able to communicate them effectively *and at the right time * is another thing all together.

Rather than try to explain everything to them every time , sometimes point them towards resources that might suit their capacities and perceptive angle.
:twothumbsup:

Of course there are degrees of assistance also. Although it will not be consistent we can still have right conduct.

When someone is bleeding by the side of the road no need to wait until you have realized emptiness to help.

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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by Saoshun » Sat May 30, 2015 3:33 pm

Learn some tantra or mantrayana stuff if you don't have clarity and prajna to open people mind by arguments and knowledge (pointing out). You can just transfer mantra energy to people if they are skeptical so you will spark up curiosity by skillful means.

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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by zengen » Sun May 31, 2015 3:13 am

Vasana wrote: "If you really wish to benefit others, the first step is to attain realization yourself. You must first mature your own mind, otherwise you will be incapable of helping others. Giving other people water is impossible unless you have a jug with water in it. If it is empty, you might make the gesture of pouring , but no water will come out." ~ Dilgo Khyentse Rinpoche -
:good:
There is no meaning to cyclic existence.

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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by antiquebuddhas » Thu Jun 11, 2015 8:14 am

There is no quick way to help others. Until and unless you are not self aware and don't have knowledge, it is difficult to help others.
First you need to be self aware, and gain knowledge, and of course it takes time of your life.
:anjali:
"Thousands of candles can be lighted from a single candle, and the life of the candle will not be shortened. Happiness never decreases by being shared." Lord Buddha

Saoshun
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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by Saoshun » Thu Jun 11, 2015 8:28 am

Learn other people Liao Fan philosophy because mostly people want things for their benefit we can use it by skillful means with Liao Fan things.

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lobster
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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by lobster » Thu Jun 11, 2015 9:00 am

As people have rightly suggested 'the how' comes with realisation. Everything else is just guesswork. I am helping by talking, by not talking, by [insert ignorant 'compassionate', 'wise' behavour of choice]

Realisation then :hug:

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Johnny Dangerous
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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by Johnny Dangerous » Thu Jun 11, 2015 8:23 pm

My 2 cents:

1) Work on your own stuff, I think it's a much better bet that we can effect people positively in this way, than in any contrived attempt to throw Dharma at them.
Working on your own stuff (of course all IME) will actually open up general opportunities for helping others that you would not have seen otherwise.

2) Rejoice in the merit of all sentient beings, not just those who are familiar with Dharma.

3) If people are interested, and I am capable, I give small bits of info about Dharma..IME though, this is really best left to a teacher beyond "the basics", because I think we often over-estimate our abilities to communicate Dharmic ideas to non-practitioners.

4) Recommend books, if you think you know of one that would resonate with whoever you are talking to.
"it must be coming from the mouthy mastermind of raunchy rapper, Johnny Dangerous”

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joy&peace
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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by joy&peace » Thu Jun 11, 2015 8:24 pm

Wonderful question; wonderful thread.

Compassionate, non-attached presence is the most expedient means of helping others. No attachment, no projection, no rejection, simply be present and mindful and kind - this works miracles, and is the most transforming path of peace, in my experience.
Om Gate Gate Paragate Parasamgate bodhi svaha

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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by joy&peace » Thu Jun 11, 2015 8:54 pm

I almost posted as well, a third paragraph, 'take heart, when one attains liberation or Buddhahood, one's ancestors will also be liberated,' but I wanted to do a little search before I posted it. In doing so, I found this, and felt like it may be of benefit.

http://www.mindfulnessbell.org/wp/tag/l ... ancestors/

This seemed especially nice:

'The third awareness tells us how joy, peace, freedom and harmony are not individual matters. We have to live in a way that allows our ancestors inside us to be liberated. Liberating them means liberating ourselves. If we do not liberate them, we. will be in bondage an our lives, and we will transmit that to our children and grandchildren. Now is the time to liberate our parents and ancestors in us. We can offer them joy, peace, freedom, and harmony, at the same time as we offer joy, peace, freedom, and harmony to ourselves, our children, and their children. This reflects the teaching of interbeing. As long as our ancestors in us are still suffering, we cannot really be happy. If we take one step mindfully, freely, happily touching the earth, we are doing it for all our ancestors and all future generations.'

and somewhat unrelated, but I came across this earlier today, I feel that it's really good. :)

http://tnhaudio.org/tag/three-doors-of-liberation/

Peace and all good things to you and your family :)

:anjali:
Om Gate Gate Paragate Parasamgate bodhi svaha

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PadmeSamadhi
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Re: How to help people the quickest?

Post by PadmeSamadhi » Fri Jun 12, 2015 3:30 pm

Meeting a qualified lama is by far the quickest and more serious way to help any being, the same way meeting a bodhisatwa, meeting a hight lama, meeting a siddha, meeting a mahasiddha, meeting a buddha... all those but not in that order.

Question answered, close topic! :rolling:
Right? It is simple, but the person need to meet someone like that, or going to the Maitreya Loving Kindness Tour and being blessed with Maitreya's relic.

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