Father has cancer.

Requesting and offering prayers and aspirations for those in need.
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Father has cancer.

Post by Jesse » Tue Apr 16, 2019 12:09 am

Hello all.

My father was diagnosed with cancer about a month ago. He has stage 4 bladder cancer.

Today they had to shut off function to one of his kidneys but can't remove it due to complications with the cancer.

He is in the most pain I've ever seen him in. My father doesn't show pain to anyone.. he will sit in agony and smile. I am sitting in his room and he is begging and crying for someone to make the pain stop.

He is in so much pain. Please say some prayers for him if you have time or the inclination. The doctors have only given him weeks to months..

So please If you can include him in your prayers.

Thank you so much
The cost of a thing is the amount of what I call life which is required to be exchanged for it, immediately or in the long run.
-Henry David Thoreau

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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by pemachophel » Tue Apr 16, 2019 12:51 am


Very sorry to hear about your father's cancer. Please PM me his name and Tibetan astrology, i.e., the Tibetan zodiac animal and element of the year in which he was born, such as Fire Monkey, Water Dog, etc. Very difficult to effectively say prayers for another with out the name at the very least. If you have a digital picture that would also help.
Pema Chophel པདྨ་ཆོས་འཕེལ

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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by Mönlam Tharchin » Tue Apr 16, 2019 12:55 am



Benefits of the Medicine Buddha Mantra
With a heart wandering in ignorance down this path and that
to guide me, I simply say Namu-amida-butsu.
-- Ippen

"If sentient beings are touched by His radiance, their three afflictions will be eliminated and their bodies and minds will become gentle. They will be filled with joy and exuberance as benevolence arises in their minds. If those who are in extreme suffering, taking any of the three evil life-journeys, see this radiance, they can rest, no more pain or distress." -- Sutra of Amitāyus Buddha

The Teachings of Master Hōnen

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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by narhwal90 » Tue Apr 16, 2019 3:24 am

My father went thru that too- removed bladder and prostate. He made it through, offering prayers for your dad.

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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by Johnny Dangerous » Tue Apr 16, 2019 4:58 am

So sorry to hear about your Dad man, I'll include him in my practice.
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There's no hoarding what has vanished,
No piling up for the future;
Those who have been born are standing
Like a seed upon a needle.


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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by Jesse » Tue Apr 16, 2019 5:29 am

Thank you all so much for your prayers, and also everyone who said a prayer and didn't post, I truly thank you. I have gotten to a point in my life where I am skeptical and hesitant to pray, and hesitant to ask for others prayers.

I want to be honest. Today when I came in my father's hospital room; I didn't expect to see what I did. My father-- regardless of any faults he may have; is one strong son-of-a-bitch. He never cries, when he's in pain he'll more likely laugh it off so others won't worry about him. I guess he's just old school.

Never in my life have I heard my father cry, or ask for help. I've never seen him plead and pray for the pain to stop. You have no idea how much it affected me, I didn't even think about it, I simply began praying.

For those who wanted more information, his name is Roger. Someone asked for this information, I am not certain I got it right. I simply looked it up on google, and received this for him:
Mewa 4: The Mirror of Nagas
Luck Day: Tuesday
Life Day: Friday
Deadly Day: Wednesday

You are a Water Horse
You can PM me if you require, or want a photograph of him for your prayer. I can't thank everyone enough.. :heart:
The cost of a thing is the amount of what I call life which is required to be exchanged for it, immediately or in the long run.
-Henry David Thoreau

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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by Knotty Veneer » Tue Apr 16, 2019 7:51 am

You and your Dad are in my thoughts and prayers.

My wife survived serious cancer last year and so I know something of what you are going through. I too do not believe in the power of petitionary prayer but the fact that so people in many different faiths said they were prayering for her (and me!) was very helpful. It let us know we had emotional support and were not going through it alone. And on some level, the positive emotional impact of that support I am sure helped my wife fight the disease. It may not have had the effect of the chemo, radition and surgery but it did give her happiness and a positive outlook. That had to count for something.
“If you are going to put people on pedestals, at least wear a big hat” - Jake Thackray.

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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by shaunc » Tue Apr 16, 2019 12:51 pm

Thoughts and prayers are with you, your father and the rest of the family.

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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by £$&^@ » Tue Apr 16, 2019 1:09 pm

For Roger...and Jesse and family.

My name is Simon John Ellis. Husband of a Buddhist wife. Father of a Buddhist son. And I will have Enlightenment in this life or the next.

( Or the next..or the next....)

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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by PSM » Tue Apr 16, 2019 3:03 pm

Much love and many prayers to you both.

I have always loved this prayer, which has a real power to it:

dü sum sangye guru rinpoché

Buddha of the three times, Guru Rinpoche,
ngödrub kün dak dewa chenpö shyab
Lord of all siddhis, Great Bliss,
barché kün sel düdül drakpo tsal
Dispeller of all obstacles, Wrathful Tamer of Māra.
solwa deb so jin gyi lab tu sol
I supplicate you, bestow your blessings.
chi nang sangwé barché shyiwa dang
Pacify the outer, inner, and secret obstacles
sampa lhün gyi drubpar jin gyi lob
And spontaneously fulfill all wishes.
"The only virtue which cannot be faked is courage" - Nassim Nicholas Taleb
"Not practicing dharma is painful" - Chokyi Nyima Rinpoche
"We don't want to feel the weirdness of life." - James Low

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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by Miroku » Tue Apr 16, 2019 4:38 pm

Its a good idea to start doing some practice for him. There are many practices that can be done, be it purification practices, such as shitro, or more wrathful practices as the Three Wrathful Ones, Guru Dragpo, Guru Dragphur, Garuda, Vajrakilaya too I think, etc. Or maybe some long life practices (White Tara, Amitayus, Namgylma (actually Garchen Rinpoche will give a Namgyalma empowerment via webcast in 2 weeks and the Three Wrathful ones too I think in May).

Hope he gets better!
A boat delivers you to the other riverbank.
A needle stitches up your clothes.
A horse takes you where you want to go.
Bodhicitta will bring you to Buddhahood.
~ Khunu Lama Rinpoche

Even non-buddhists have many virtuous accomplishments
~ Jigten Sumgon

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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by Minobu » Wed Apr 17, 2019 4:14 pm

Jesse wrote:
Tue Apr 16, 2019 5:29 am
I have gotten to a point in my life where I am skeptical and hesitant to pray, and hesitant to ask for others prayers.
The point of our various Buddhist practices is to attain Buddhahood.

We believe in prayer because it does work. Not all the time it might seem , but behind the scenes so much is happening for one's development over eternity.
Prayer is like physical exercise in the sense that one develops. It's part of the evolution process towards full blown Buddhahood.

Your father sounds like he is built from pure compassion for others and does not want anyone to be bothered by his illness.

He is evolved and with you being his child , will be protected and find the path in future that's perfect for him.

all the best

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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by Dan74 » Wed Apr 17, 2019 8:10 pm

Oh, Jesse, I can't even begin to imagine how this.must feel for you. Even though my father is 82, and might be in the same place in just a few months.

May Roger be free from suffering. May you both be well. Take care of yourself, Jesse. Maybe that's the best you can do for your old man.


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Re: Father has cancer.

Post by Berry » Sat Apr 20, 2019 3:34 pm

Dear Jesse,

Sending love and prayers to you and your father.


Leave the polluted water of conceptual thoughts in its natural clarity. Without affirming or denying appearances, leave them as they are. When there is neither acceptance nor rejection, mind is liberated into mahāmudra.

~ Tilopa

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