Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

pauline
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Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by pauline » Wed Oct 22, 2014 5:01 pm

Hello,
My name is Pauline and i had a psychotic episode after a meditation reatreat.I had delusions and bad anxiety.I have to mention that a was psyhiatricly clean before this retreat.There is anybody else with this problem here.Any advice?I really need help.Can meditation do this?( Sorry for my bad english)

thank you

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lorem
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by lorem » Wed Oct 22, 2014 6:30 pm

TOS talks about this. If you feel you are having issues you should seek help. Actually a lot of psychiatrists, psychologists, etc are also Buddhist practitioners and teachers.

I hope you do feel better though. Love :heart:
I should be meditating.

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Ayu
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by Ayu » Wed Oct 22, 2014 8:10 pm

A psychologist who understands what is meditation and how it works would be very important.

I had such an issue also after a retreat a little bit. But I could handle it by not takin' it too serious. And I am experienced in having psychosis, but I'm healthy now since 30 years.
I have decided to stick with love.
Hate is too great a burden to bear.
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emaho
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by emaho » Wed Oct 22, 2014 10:30 pm

Yes, these things can happen. You should talk about it with a therapist or psychiatrist of your choice. It would be good if that person would have an understanding of meditation, but it is also important that she or he has a healthy distance to the specific lineage and teacher at whose retreat you have experienced these difficulties. I'm saying that because sometimes these things happen when people have received wrong meditation instructions. So don't go to a therapist who is associated to the Buddhist center or who is recommended to you by members of that group. Ask independent friends for recommendations.
"I struggled with some demons, They were middle class and tame..." L. Cohen

pemachophel
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by pemachophel » Wed Oct 22, 2014 11:53 pm

What about talking with the Lama who was running the retreat?

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Pema Chophel པདྨ་ཆོས་འཕེལ

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lorem
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by lorem » Thu Oct 23, 2014 12:05 am

pemachophel wrote:What about talking with the Lama who was running the retreat?
You should especially talk to the lama if anything occurs during the retreat. Sometimes can be simple as "strange" reactions to diet/rlung and 2 hamburgers might help.
I should be meditating.

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florin
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by florin » Thu Oct 23, 2014 12:25 am

Can you give more details about the type of meditation, Lama, etc ?
And you posted in the dzogchen section because is related to dzogchen or is because you made a mistake ?
"Bow down to me for I thirst for an infinite ocean of blood, since the innumerable torrents of floods at kalpa's end that terrify all world systems do not even wet the tip of my tongue"

pauline
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by pauline » Thu Oct 23, 2014 8:05 am

It was a 10 days retreat with HE Chonden Rimpoche.The theme of the meditation was the void.
Thank you all for the answer with love Pauline

pauline
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by pauline » Thu Oct 23, 2014 8:13 am

I don't know a lot about Budhism.A friend of mine took me there and this was the result.It was a kind of hypnotic trance.A verry deep meditation about 8 ours a day.At the end of these 10 days i had a full psychotic breakdown.I had false belives, delirium,i thought i was a budhist master incarnation etc.
with love pauline :heart:

pauline
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by pauline » Thu Oct 23, 2014 12:45 pm

Sorry, HE Choden Rimpoche is the correct name of the lama.

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Seishin
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by Seishin » Thu Oct 23, 2014 12:56 pm

It is generally advised not to go on a long retreat without prior experience - I'm not sure if this is your case though.

I have been taught that meditation will bring to the surface feelings/thoughts/emotions that we have subconsciously tried to bury. It could be that the psychotic break was under the surface and the retreat 'released' it rather than 'caused' it. But I am no expert, so please take this with a pinch of salt.

I hope you feel better soon.
In Gassho,
Seishin

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lorem
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by lorem » Thu Oct 23, 2014 1:07 pm

Yes. If you really do feel like you need help you should seek medical treatment.

But yes Chod practice can cause anxiety and some lamas also say protector practices can. (Some say do as much as possible to even heard none.)
I should be meditating.

hop.pala
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by hop.pala » Thu Oct 23, 2014 1:46 pm

pauline wrote:Hello,
My name is Pauline and i had a psychotic episode after a meditation reatreat.I had delusions and bad anxiety.I have to mention that a was psyhiatricly clean before this retreat.There is anybody else with this problem here.Any advice?I really need help.Can meditation do this?( Sorry for my bad english)

thank you
Yes can meditation lead to mental illnes,but not in psychiatric terms.When you meditate go with your consciousness up,and are sleeping level of consciousness.You can wake up it by meditation,and when you no meditate the mindlevels is awaken.The awakened parts of the mind can see the upper parts,and can try to reject some things from himself.Can try to push down,because think that is disturbend for him,but in this case can this thing disturbend for the person.
If you meditate a lot,can you make clean one part of your mind clean,but when you not change your mind the cleaned consciosness can later disturb strongly your physical consciosness,with speech,or with pictures or with both.

pauline
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by pauline » Thu Oct 23, 2014 2:14 pm

Thanks for the answers
Look what i found.....very interesting video
http://alohadharma.wordpress.com/2011/0 ... editation/#" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
:heart:

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lorem
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by lorem » Thu Oct 23, 2014 2:29 pm

If a practice really doesn't feel right consult the lama. On important matters even lamas will get 6 Mos from different lamas to verify something. So don't be afraid to question.
And in the end, the love you take is equal to the love you make
I should be meditating.

pauline
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by pauline » Thu Oct 23, 2014 2:39 pm

I tried to contact the lama but i got no answer:( :thinking:

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lorem
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by lorem » Thu Oct 23, 2014 3:23 pm

Geshe Gyalten, or another of the lamas at Ananda could probably help also.
I tried to contact the lama but i got no answer:( :thinking:
Luckily we have Buddha, dharma, and sangha. But if you like the explanation you found then that'll do. Some people work well with a traditional model, other with a modern model. Some just float on the wind. 80,000 dharma doors for all types.
I should be meditating.

hop.pala
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by hop.pala » Thu Oct 23, 2014 7:42 pm

"Luckily we have Buddha,"
Hahahahaha.Maybe can you later realize that "Buddha" is not for you,it is for your underconciousness,or not for that only for your bodhicitta.And do not forget anatta teaching.If you ever meet a buddhic consciousness,can realize,that Buddha try in every moment kill your physical conciousness.It is not a pleasant thing.The idiot borned on the earth,"godhead"underconsciousness.

hop.pala
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by hop.pala » Thu Oct 23, 2014 8:07 pm

pauline wrote:Hello,
My name is Pauline and i had a psychotic episode after a meditation reatreat.I had delusions and bad anxiety.I have to mention that a was psyhiatricly clean before this retreat.There is anybody else with this problem here.Any advice?I really need help.Can meditation do this?( Sorry for my bad english)

thank you
And later when you meditate more.And the cleaned parts of your consciousness clear,can be directed by enlightened masters.From people they accept the living ,and leading through the underconsciousness.And then come the born on the earth buddha tale-tulku.Who is an underconsciousness god.

Arjan Dirkse
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Re: Psychotic break after a meditation retreat

Post by Arjan Dirkse » Fri Oct 24, 2014 6:32 pm

Pauline, I am not sure what country you are in, but normally your doctor (your regular GP) has enough knowledge to recognize psychiatric emergencies. Just go to your doctor, tell him or her about this, and he'll be able to help or send you to a psychologist/psychiatrist who is able to help.

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