Is it being attached to miss someone?
Is it being attached to miss someone?
If I have to part ways with someone soon with little hope of seeing her again and I feel sad, am I being attached?
Re: Is it being attached to miss someone?
Of course it is. Think about it this way - every day you pass people on the street and you will never see them again. Do you mourn that?
Doesn't mean you should beat yourself up over it though, and I'm really sorry you're feeling sad.
Doesn't mean you should beat yourself up over it though, and I'm really sorry you're feeling sad.
NAMO SARASWATI DEVI
Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. - GANDHI
I am a delicate feminine flower!!!!
Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. - GANDHI
I am a delicate feminine flower!!!!
- tomschwarz
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Re: Is it being attached to miss someone?
is it (feeling sad) being (?) attached (?).MiphamFan wrote:If I have to part ways with someone soon with little hope of seeing her again and I feel sad, am I being attached?
dearest miphamfan, don't worry about this situation. it is your tender heart. and it is your wind horse. put your shoulders back and take on the full reality of the responsibility to care for her, on her terms. not the illusion of your empire of self. silence your conceptual mind, raise your eyebrows and embrace the reality of those who need caring and your ability to love with great wisdom and skill.
that is the natural transform of attachment/desire into the pristine cognition of discernment, without renunciation.
you have my full love and support in this situation.
i dedicate this post to your happiness, the causes of your happiness, the absence of your suffering the causes of the absence of your suffering that we may not have too much attachment nor aversion. SAMAYAMANUPALAYA
Re: Is it being attached to miss someone?
I am sorry for that.MiphamFan wrote:If I have to part ways with someone soon with little hope of seeing her again and I feel sad, am I being attached?
I know that feeling, MiphamFan.
I feel now a bit, when I contemplate about, that it is my mind its reaction from which I suffered. Holding on the image of the beloved one in our mind is increasing that pain in our heart, by which mind falls in a chain of reactions till these soften. That holding on image keeps the pain alive by many changing thoughts/feelings/memory. Remaining in such is actually harming ourselves. Please lets' not do that.
I heard ones that when we are in love, it is in fact being in love with the nice feeling we get by interaction. I had to contemplate about that, a bit later. Then when that nice feeling is not any longer fed, is destroyed, we feel a painful emptiness. To be freed of it can in few ways, one is that others are more, oneself is only one, H H Dalai Lama said. When I go out I see poor beings, with problems of all kind. They open my heart and love can flow by which own pain is losing.
May you be well.
Re: Is it being attached to miss someone?
There are degrees and types of attachment. If the pain fades with time, this is a simple attachment that will change from pain to wistfulness to forgetfulness and then disappear.MiphamFan wrote:If I have to part ways with someone soon with little hope of seeing her again and I feel sad, am I being attached?
If the pain grows over time, it is feeding on itself, and you are adding energy to it in a most unhealthy way. Corrective measures will be needed.
Sergeant Schultz knew everything there was to know.
Re: Is it being attached to miss someone?
If you're attached to a person you can turn that into compassion by praying "May that person be happy". And you can turn that into Bodhicitta by praying "May that person and all beings be happy and reach enlightenment soon".MiphamFan wrote:If I have to part ways with someone soon with little hope of seeing her again and I feel sad, am I being attached?
"I struggled with some demons, They were middle class and tame..." L. Cohen
Re: Is it being attached to miss someone?
Short answer: No.MiphamFan wrote:If I have to part ways with someone soon with little hope of seeing her again and I feel sad, am I being attached?
Long answer: It is more important that you find a way out of troubled waters rather than to deceive yourself with the nonexistence of your feelings.
Denying them would mean you're not in touch with them.
Re: Is it being attached to miss someone?
Thank you!