Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Josef »

dzogchungpa wrote: Thu Dec 28, 2017 9:20 pm Tsoknyi Rinpoche responds: https://whatnow727.wordpress.com/2017/1 ... -responds/
Another point for basic humanity.
"All phenomena of samsara depend on the mind, so when the essence of mind is purified, samsara is purified. Since the phenomena of nirvana depend on the pristine consciousness of vidyā, because one remains in the immediacy of vidyā, buddhahood arises on its own. All critical points are summarized with those two." - Longchenpa
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Malcolm »

Josef wrote: Fri Dec 29, 2017 9:48 pm
dzogchungpa wrote: Thu Dec 28, 2017 9:20 pm Tsoknyi Rinpoche responds: https://whatnow727.wordpress.com/2017/1 ... -responds/
Another point for basic humanity.
Yes, but then there is this:
Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the shrine room, along comes another eye watering revelation. This time it is not Sogyal – but one of his close buddies, a teacher from the Nyingma tradition of Tibetan Buddhism known as Namkha Rinpoche. He runs an outfit called Rigdzin which has centres in several European countries including Spain, Switzerland, the Netherlands and France. Namkha’s career follows a similar pattern to Sogyal’s – unsavoury rumours about his sex life have circulated within diaspora Tibetan Buddhism for many years. And some people have expressed doubts about his qualifications as a lama. Now one brave woman has blown the whistle about her experiences with Namkha – a horror story of exploitation and sexual abuse. This woman, who wants to be known as Tar, was close to Namkha for many years. Her story is corroborated by another individual who also wishes to remain anonymous. Their real names are known to me. Here Is Tar’s story. It was translated from French into English by Peter Robinson and edited by Mary Finnigan. The original French version is available on request.

At the end of 2005 I attended my first teaching in Lausanne given by NR. It was the Four Noble Truths. At 47, I was still looking for answers and this teaching made me want to go deeper.

NR spoke in Tibetan and was translated by a close student. The more advanced students dressed as ngakpas wearing the robes of Vajrayana practitioners. NR presented himself as a Tibetan refugee and a tulku. He is ngakpa, with a wife and 2 daughters.
The question of taking refuge in the 3 jewels and in addition the tantric vows was put to me. I wasn't informed that I would have to accumulate 100,000 prostrations and recite the refuge prayer 100,000 times. Until then I regularly practised recitations and prostrations. I was introduced to chine meditation sessions, which I found beneficial. Up until then, NR showed a peaceful appearance and presented himself as the father lama protector.
Everything changed when I received a call from NR who proposed to me to do a secret tantric practice in order to pacify my mind. I answered that it scared me and that at the same time I wanted to have a calm mind. I vaguely understood that I would be alone with him. He hastened to say that it was not because I was a beautiful woman but a sensitive being that he wanted to bring on the path of enlightenment.

I waited several months before giving him an answer. One day, I got a phone call from NR: he said that he had separated from his wife and had no idea where to sleep... I suggested he contact his secretary but she lived in an apartment right next to NR's wife. I was searching for a solution because I didn't want to invite him to my home, so I rented a room at an inn for him and we met there.

I helped him to settle into the room, then I suggested he should go to eat with the other guests, which he refused. He prepared food in the room and I ate with him in silence. He asked me to stay, saying he had to get up the next day at 4 am to go to see a Lama friend.
Suddenly, without any warning, he began to kiss me. He smellled very bad as if he has not washed for several days. It was an animal sexual relationship in which I had no role. He mumbled prayers in Tibetan and then remained in meditative position with an erection. He asked me to wake him up at 4 o'clock. I was so shocked, not understanding what happened. I did not close my eyes that night, I was in a state of semi stupor, which I believed to be a beginning of a state without thoughts.

When he woke up, he told me not to tell anyone what happened, otherwise a demon would take possession of me.
I continued to frequent the Buddhist centre. In 2008 the community lived on donations from participants, all quite modest financially (I gave 200 francs per month, plus flower offerings, and most of my free time outside my work as a nurse to severely disabled people). The committee and the lama planned to bring HH the Dalai Lama to Lausanne in 2009. A financial guarantee was required in case of cancellation of the event. I had a little money in an account after my divorce (22 years of life together and 3 children). I committed the sum of 25,000 Swiss francs, with the blessing of NR.
I remember that NR gave a lecture, he was drunk and told the assembly that we were all bad people ... It was already starting to worry me at that moment. The commercial side of the event was also aimed at bailing out the Rigdzin Centre’s finances.

I started to be part of "lama care", the service to the lama doing admin duties during retreats and teachings. It was hard but I did not complain about this slave job. I had to promise not to create discord --- there were many tensions. That's when I discovered that "secret practice" was offered to almost all women in the community. Some left because they were afraid. Only one of them refused because she was married.
If my memory is good, I received another phone call from NR that year. I had to get him by car from his house and bring him to mine. This time it was a degree above the first experience. Still no clear teaching, but a kind of "bad sex party". But Yeshe Tsogyal offered her body, did she not?
Strangely, NR's wife knew nothing about Dharma, she was just a figurehead.

Then NR asked me to become the girlfriend of a half brother of his wife, with the intention that I married him so that he could get his papers. When I discovered the situation, I ended the relationship with the half brother. He was not practising the Dharma and was mocking me.
NR decided to find me a partner in the person of his tailor. What a horror, I measure 1 meter 73 and this little Tibetan was just 1 meter 50. I saw him once and he told me all his misery, his visits to prostitutes, his divorce. I cried partly out of compassion a little out of disgust. I made it clear to NR that it was over.

In 2010, my 87-year-old mother was at the end of her life. She had a strong faith in life, she was a strong and kind person. She was not a Buddhist but appreciated the Dalai Lama. I was looking forward to practising with her. She died on the day a lama was invited to the Rigdzin Centre. He taught powa ...and prayed for my mother (I had goose bumps, this lama was genuine and full of true compassion). His name is Ayang Rinpoche. Of course, my mother was cremated according to the protestant ceremony with just close family there. She passed over in peace.
Shortly after her death, NR asked me for money for the prayers that were made for her in monasteries in Tibet. I am not used to giving money for prayers, for me a prayer is a gift. However, I ardently hoped that my mother would be accompanied in the bardo.
I discovered a sum of 5000 francs in a box that she left at the bank for me. So, I went with the 5000 francs in cash to see Rinpoche. Oddly, he said "It's a big sum, give it to my wife" I will never know if this money went to the monks or if it was used for the luxurious expenses of his wife. All the mattered to me right then were the 49 days of prayer for my mum.

At the end of the 49 days, I went back to see NR and humbly asked him if he knew where my mother has taken rebirth. His answer shocked me, he told me that he didn't know my mother and could not see how she had reincarnated. The positive side of this great lack of compassion is that I still practised and I promised myself that if one must go to hell for having compassion for her, then I will go with or without NR's blessing.
I also experienced the following in 2010

I drove the translator's girlfriend to Drolo Ling, the Rigzin Centre in the south of France. NR gave an initiation. In the evening I went to sleep in a dormitory with thin walls between each room. To my surprise NR and Rinchen, the president of the French centre entered the "box" next to me. They did not know I was listening, but I heard a conversation in English (NR speaks basic English).
What I heard is beyond my comprehension. Rinchen offered girls from ... 16 years old to NR for practices. The 2 men described them: they are beautiful. ... they were laughing. They are virgins ...

I spoke to the translator's girlfriend that I was shocked because at 16 they are minors in France! She did not take me seriously and I kept that to myself. I have a daughter who was 22 years old at the time and one day NR asked me: Will you give me your daughter?? I told him that I do not make decisions for her and that she would surely not agree.

I have more facts dating back to 2011. I was off work with a broken knee and I thought I would spend a few days at the Rigdzin residential centre Namkha Dzong in southern Spain. I slept in the corridor and almost every night NR made me go up to his room when the others slept. He was brutal, I was in pain but could not scream. I had bruises on my breasts and he pushed his fist into my vagina, which bled. That day he made fun of me asking me in front of other men: Isn't it true that you do not have sex? It was humiliating!

Back in Switzerland I had a gynaecological check. For the first time in my life I had a papilloma virus. My immune system defences were low. I followed a treatment and consulted a therapist. She understood everything and I could talk to her about what had happened.

At this point my body was weakened. I convinced myself that I wanted to continue practising for sentient beings. My poor knee did not allow me to do my daily practices. I could not sit in lotus anymore. One day I was doing my prostrations in the temple when NR surprised me with a cushion to soften my prostration. He made a point to all the practitioners that a student who was using a cushion and had to start her accumulations all over again. I had painfully reached 75,000 prostrations. I came out in tears and learned that if I left once again I would be thrown out of the sangha.
At that time, we were going to receive special teachings. Some students who gave a lot of money were exempted from finishing their practice, I found it unfair, and I told NR about it and he told me that I would have teachings later. One student went and NR said she had maintained a vow of silence for 3 weeks. I said I did not believe it, and he again threatened to throw me out.
So, started the work of psychological destruction: I was the worst, I made him ashamed.I thought to myself that I would not let him throw me out. I will just leave!

I have taken ngakma vows. I remember that NR said that he had forgotten to give me them earlier and that his wife had interceded on my behalf. So, I put on the red and white zen. I remember being uneasy when I had to kneel at the feet of Rinpoche sitting on his throne, like an animal that surrendered. I also told the translator that I had a papilloma virus and that I thought I had caught from him in secret practices. I wanted a little compassion for myself and for all women who exposed themselves to contamination (never a condom). He told me that if I caught HIV it would have been better for me because then there would have been danger. I was nauseated. I said to him: Would you say the same thing if it was your girlfriend who was infected? I was disgusted. He trivialised the situation.

A little incident happened to me the night of taking ngakma vows. I made the water offerings in the temple and there were lots of of small burning candles. It was necessary, as usual, to hurry up. My brand new zen caught fire. Fortunately, I was able to extinguish the flame and not burn myself
I started to avoid going to the annual retreats that took place in Switzerland in Evolène in the canton of Valais. The last retreat I did, I rented a hotel room to avoid having to sleep in a dormitory. (I slept with an insomniac practitioner and his dog, with a practitioner plugged into a respirator, I did not sleep, I even slept on a carpet in the temple).

I decided to make an appointment with NR in his office in Lausanne. It was almost impossible to have an interview without the translator's presence.
I told NR that I had a papilloma virus and that I was certainly not the only one. I told him, with compassion, that he would do well to watch over his wife. (I had learned not long ago that she had been hospitalised for "gynaecological problems.") His wife had undergone a procedure to remove pieces of vaginal mucous that could degenerate into cancer. He said he was going to talk to her.
I said in my polite way that I found these practices dangerous to women's health. I explained to him that it is men who transmit the virus but do not experience any symptoms.

I have stopped following the teachings. I regularly received messages from NR for a few months. He said to me "I was kidding, I'm not going to kick you out, come back because you also worked a lot for this Buddhist centre, take advantage of what you gave" He also added, "You are my dharma darling, I love you, come back ..." I told him that he was my root lama and not my dharma darling. At that time many practitioners left Rinpoche and the sangha.
Rinpoche's secretary is the only one who tried to contact me. He knows a part of my story. He does not agree with these secret practices but at the same time he is not ready to directly oppose NR.

To this day, only one practitioner who has left the sangha, and who is a lawyer, has offered me her support if I testify about the things I saw in Rigdzin and with NR. She offered to confirm several occasions when NR spoke about me with contempt in front of the sangha.
One day in 2015 I received a message from the translator. He stated that I should not come back to Rigdzin, He asked me to resign. I told him I would prefer to go before a public meeting to explain the reason for my absence. I never heard from him in response.
My intention is not to blame NR. I only want to shed light on his actions.
I want to heal and continue to practise kindness for all beings as an ordinary person. Then I will be able to help other women to heal.
I believe that the feminine energy is more than ever necessary for the planet, and for humanity, and I will struggle so that it is preserved and honoured.
https://www.facebook.com/groups/1459918 ... uery=NR%20
Norwegian
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Norwegian »

Now that is just F'ed up.
Tiago Simões
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Tiago Simões »

Thats very hard to read...
Tenma
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Tenma »

If he's not our guru, let's not worry on this. Just be cautious, that's all. But yes, I find this very hard to read.
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Josef »

I read that one the other day.
Simply awful. This isn’t the conduct of dharma practitioners, definitely not teachers.
"All phenomena of samsara depend on the mind, so when the essence of mind is purified, samsara is purified. Since the phenomena of nirvana depend on the pristine consciousness of vidyā, because one remains in the immediacy of vidyā, buddhahood arises on its own. All critical points are summarized with those two." - Longchenpa
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Norwegian »

Josef wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:49 am I read that one the other day.
Simply awful. This isn’t the conduct of dharma practitioners, definitely not teachers.
It's the conduct of predators. Predators who should be behind bars. Their religious garb should be stripped off them and replaced with prison uniforms instead, much more fitting.

It really is sad.

I have but one wish, and that is that people manage to connect with qualified teachers if they enter into Buddhadharma. That's all. Then, do their best.
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Josef
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Josef »

Norwegian wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:52 am
Josef wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:49 am I read that one the other day.
Simply awful. This isn’t the conduct of dharma practitioners, definitely not teachers.
It's the conduct of predators. Predators who should be behind bars. Their religious garb should be stripped off them and replaced with prison uniforms instead, much more fitting.

It really is sad.

I have but one wish, and that is that people manage to connect with qualified teachers if they enter into Buddhadharma. That's all. Then, do their best.
I’m right there with you Norwegian.
It’s absolutely outrageous that this behavior has been tolerated in our communities.
They are predators and they have legions apologists behind them.
"All phenomena of samsara depend on the mind, so when the essence of mind is purified, samsara is purified. Since the phenomena of nirvana depend on the pristine consciousness of vidyā, because one remains in the immediacy of vidyā, buddhahood arises on its own. All critical points are summarized with those two." - Longchenpa
PeterC
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by PeterC »

Josef wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:56 am
Norwegian wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:52 am
Josef wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:49 am I read that one the other day.
Simply awful. This isn’t the conduct of dharma practitioners, definitely not teachers.
It's the conduct of predators. Predators who should be behind bars. Their religious garb should be stripped off them and replaced with prison uniforms instead, much more fitting.

It really is sad.

I have but one wish, and that is that people manage to connect with qualified teachers if they enter into Buddhadharma. That's all. Then, do their best.
I’m right there with you Norwegian.
It’s absolutely outrageous that this behavior has been tolerated in our communities.
They are predators and they have legions apologists behind them.

Sadly, this sort of behaviour will continue to be tolerated until prominent lamas speak out against it. There will always be credulous students. More lamas need to set an example that this behaviour defames the Dharma and specifically the Tibetan teachers of the Vajrayana. It's great that HHDL, Mingyur R and Tsoknyi R have publicly spoken out against it. It remains hugely disappointing that most have remained silent or spoken in support of the abusers. This really isn't a difficult ethical issue.
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Ricky »

Pure insanity. How can some people be so gullible to follow trash like that?
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Tlalok »

Ricky wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:24 am Pure insanity. How can some people be so gullible to follow trash like that?
Lots of rational and intelligent people find themselves in abusive relationships all the time.
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Quay »

PeterC wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:17 am
Josef wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:56 am
Norwegian wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:52 am
It's the conduct of predators. Predators who should be behind bars. Their religious garb should be stripped off them and replaced with prison uniforms instead, much more fitting.

It really is sad.

I have but one wish, and that is that people manage to connect with qualified teachers if they enter into Buddhadharma. That's all. Then, do their best.
I’m right there with you Norwegian.
It’s absolutely outrageous that this behavior has been tolerated in our communities.
They are predators and they have legions apologists behind them.

Sadly, this sort of behaviour will continue to be tolerated until prominent lamas speak out against it. There will always be credulous students. More lamas need to set an example that this behaviour defames the Dharma and specifically the Tibetan teachers of the Vajrayana. It's great that HHDL, Mingyur R and Tsoknyi R have publicly spoken out against it. It remains hugely disappointing that most have remained silent or spoken in support of the abusers. This really isn't a difficult ethical issue.
Yes to Norwegian's remarks and to all of yours, especially that last sentence from PeterC. It's not that difficult. "Busy dick" causes a lot of problems for so many people and when it becomes predatory behavior it needs to cease immediately. Of course accounts must be verified but there have been so many like this that the pattern is pretty clear.

May true Dharma conquer this appalling behavior. _(|)_
"Knowledge is as infinite as the stars in the sky;
There is no end to all the subjects one could study.
It is better to grasp straight away their very essence--
The unchanging fortress of the Dharmakaya."

– Longchenpa.
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Josef
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Josef »

PeterC wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:17 am
Josef wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:56 am
Norwegian wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:52 am
It's the conduct of predators. Predators who should be behind bars. Their religious garb should be stripped off them and replaced with prison uniforms instead, much more fitting.

It really is sad.

I have but one wish, and that is that people manage to connect with qualified teachers if they enter into Buddhadharma. That's all. Then, do their best.
I’m right there with you Norwegian.
It’s absolutely outrageous that this behavior has been tolerated in our communities.
They are predators and they have legions apologists behind them.

Sadly, this sort of behaviour will continue to be tolerated until prominent lamas speak out against it. There will always be credulous students. More lamas need to set an example that this behaviour defames the Dharma and specifically the Tibetan teachers of the Vajrayana. It's great that HHDL, Mingyur R and Tsoknyi R have publicly spoken out against it. It remains hugely disappointing that most have remained silent or spoken in support of the abusers. This really isn't a difficult ethical issue.
Well said Peter.
We have seen prominent lamas squander the opportunity to speak out against this abuse and instead make excuses and shame the victims. Many have lost credibility in the past few months.
"All phenomena of samsara depend on the mind, so when the essence of mind is purified, samsara is purified. Since the phenomena of nirvana depend on the pristine consciousness of vidyā, because one remains in the immediacy of vidyā, buddhahood arises on its own. All critical points are summarized with those two." - Longchenpa
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Ricky »

Tlalok wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:27 am
Ricky wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:24 am Pure insanity. How can some people be so gullible to follow trash like that?
Lots of rational and intelligent people find themselves in abusive relationships all the time.
I don't want to blame this poor victim at all but someone who gets fisted (to the point of bleeding) and raped yet keeps going back to receive "teachings" doesn't seem very intelligent nor rational.
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Quay »

Ricky wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:47 am
Tlalok wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:27 am
Ricky wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:24 am Pure insanity. How can some people be so gullible to follow trash like that?
Lots of rational and intelligent people find themselves in abusive relationships all the time.
I don't want to blame this poor victim at all but someone who gets fisted (to the point of bleeding) and raped yet keeps going back to receive "teachings" doesn't seem very intelligent nor rational.
It can seem strange to someone who has not experienced such abuse, worked with survivors of such things, or even studied it from a medical perspective. Yet it is quite real and can do horrible things even to the most intelligent and rational kinds of people. Even to those with incredibly high intelligence and demonstrated skill in rational thought and reasoning.
"Knowledge is as infinite as the stars in the sky;
There is no end to all the subjects one could study.
It is better to grasp straight away their very essence--
The unchanging fortress of the Dharmakaya."

– Longchenpa.
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by Grigoris »

Just when you thought it was safe to go back into the shrine room, along comes another eye watering revelation..... Then I will be able to help other women to heal.
I believe that the feminine energy is more than ever necessary for the planet, and for humanity, and I will struggle so that it is preserved and honoured.
That is some sad shit!
"My religion is not deceiving myself."
Jetsun Milarepa 1052-1135 CE

"Butchers, prostitutes, those guilty of the five most heinous crimes, outcasts, the underprivileged: all are utterly the substance of existence and nothing other than total bliss."
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The Fundamental Tantra of Dzogchen Semde
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by gb9810 »

Norwegian wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:52 am
Josef wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 12:49 am I read that one the other day.
Simply awful. This isn’t the conduct of dharma practitioners, definitely not teachers.
It's the conduct of predators. Predators who should be behind bars. Their religious garb should be stripped off them and replaced with prison uniforms instead, much more fitting.

It really is sad.

I have but one wish, and that is that people manage to connect with qualified teachers if they enter into Buddhadharma. That's all. Then, do their best.
horrific story... sad on so many levels. agree with your wish too here...
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by narhwal90 »

Quay wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:54 am
Ricky wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:47 am
Tlalok wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:27 am

Lots of rational and intelligent people find themselves in abusive relationships all the time.
I don't want to blame this poor victim at all but someone who gets fisted (to the point of bleeding) and raped yet keeps going back to receive "teachings" doesn't seem very intelligent nor rational.
It can seem strange to someone who has not experienced such abuse, worked with survivors of such things, or even studied it from a medical perspective. Yet it is quite real and can do horrible things even to the most intelligent and rational kinds of people. Even to those with incredibly high intelligence and demonstrated skill in rational thought and reasoning.
It is very common in family situations involving addiction. Sometimes the addict is the abuser sometimes not. I have spoken with an alcoholic woman (now in recovery) who went after her husband with a knife with in the intent to kill- and have heard plenty other similar events going the other way too. Sometimes the fear of leaving is greater than the pain of staying, regardless of rationality- which by the time the abuse is getting bad, is usually distorted to say the least.
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Re: Very sad news: Letter to Sogyal Rinpoche / Abuse allegations

Post by gb9810 »

Ricky wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:47 am
Tlalok wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:27 am
Ricky wrote: Sat Dec 30, 2017 3:24 am Pure insanity. How can some people be so gullible to follow trash like that?
Lots of rational and intelligent people find themselves in abusive relationships all the time.
I don't want to blame this poor victim at all but someone who gets fisted (to the point of bleeding) and raped yet keeps going back to receive "teachings" doesn't seem very intelligent nor rational.
I think you kinda missed the point ...

all the complicated psychological entanglement aside (which I am not an expert to comment on): is this kind of behavior from a teacher any more tolerable or justifiable, due to the (perceived) intelligence of the student?! If the victim clinically retarded or a certified genius, it'd make the behavior somehow ok? If we believe in her story (which I do), whether she goes back or not is not up to our judgement, how he behaved as a teacher, on the other hand, absolute is. It's outrageous!
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